“Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon” – Dru’s Review

I recently had the opportunity to go see the new Transformers movie in the theater.  Beware that I WILL give out spoilers, so tread carefully as we move on.

I'm a fan of movies - always have been, always will be.  I pride myself on the fact that I gag whenever I see a new release involving a predictable chick-flick where the main characters who are at odds with each other in the beginning miraculously realize they've fallen madly in love and can't live without the other by the end.  I find these movies far more unrealistic than anything involving aliens or dragons; at least you walk into those movies knowing what you're about to see is fiction.  I very much prefer "boy movies" where things blow up and people die; throw in some supernatural, sci-fi geekness and I call it a winner!  So imagine my delight when Transformers was slated to hit the big screen!  Words failed to capture my joy.

Now, four years after the original thrilled us to pieces, we have come to the final installment of the trilogy (anyone hears anything about a 4th movie, you let me know).  I'm the type of person who will always believe that no subsequent chapters in a film series can hold a candle to the original movie - exception here is "Lord of the Rings" and a few other rare cases.  In the case of the Transformers movies, this theory still holds true.  The first movie was complete and utter perfection - thrilling, moving, funny, enchanting, uncomplicated, and just plain awesome!  The second movie, "Revenge of the Fallen," was not only awkwardly titled, but lacked the excitement and compelling story we saw in the first.  I really didn't find anything impressive in this film beyond the actual transforming robots, and my disappointment after seeing it was palpable.  The meeting between Optimus and Sam in the cemetery was foreboding and well-done, but the cheesey love-story and impracticality of a human being coming back to life thanks to a bunch of long-dead robots was just too unbelievable even for the likes of me.  Suspension of disbelief on this one was tough and barely possible at best.

At last, we have arrived at "Dark of the Moon."  I will admit that after RotF's fail, I was reluctant to see part 3 and hugely disappointed in myself for my own lack of interest in wanting to see it at all.  However, being OCD and slightly obsessive, I forced myself to finish the trilogy I had started years ago.  Hoping to glean a better experience, I opted for a 3D viewing of DotM.  This time around, things were slightly better.  The two biggest complaints, well three actually, were: a) too much fighting - as much as I love this stuff on-screen, this one went farther than it needed to.  Most of the time the scenes cut too much and without realizing it, you found yourself in a completely different battle on the other end of town.  This is what led to complaint b) all the confusing fight scenes made the movie feel a bit too long.  If a movie is well-done and captivates you, there could be a hundred thousand fight scenes in it that will feel like it happened in an instant.  That, unfortunately, was not this case in this movie.  Things could have gone just as well, if not better, had they lost about 45% of the battles in DotM.

Finally, issue #3:  ****(HERE COME THE SPOILERS, PEOPLE)****  we are forced to say good-bye to the beloved Ironhide and a new Autobot we are introduced to in this film who had instantly become one of my favorites; I believe he was one of the Dinobots.  It was hard enough losing Jazz at the end of the first film (something I STILL have not forgiven Michael Bay for by the way), but killing Ironhide at the hands of Sentinel Prime is just cruel.  Let's not forget the Ironhide's car was badass defined!  Losing Megan Fox in this film wasn't even as difficult as losing these beloved Autobots; what did she do that was so special anyway?  Draw attention away from the sweet robots on-screen?  I'll pass, but thanks.  And just how many times is Optimus going to have to kill Megatron?!  Enough already!  We get it!  Mortal enemies, but every time Megatron comes back, he's just more pathetic than he was the last time.  Hardly, the masterpiece we had in part 1, so it doesn't come as much of a shock anymore when Optimus inevitably beats/kills Megatron.  And I'm not even going to get into how much it annoys me that Bumble-bee still doesn't talk (even though he did at the end of the first one) or how the soundtracks for each movie have gotten progressively crappier; we'd be here all day.

Despite my rantings and complaints, I guess you could say I thought DotM was worth seeing.  Still no Transformers 1, but definitely a stronger movie than RotF.  I feel safe in saying that I'd welcome part 4 should the idea ever take off; if not I'm satisfied with what we've had so far.  Maybe next time the Autobots could take on a new enemy and rid the world of the makers and producers of chick-flicks?  Just a suggestion, give it some thought.