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Reasons Why Dalton Should Never Drink And Tweet

q103 – dcastle

Drinking and tweeting are two of my favorite things but I’m slowly learning that these are not too things I should at the same time. Tweeting while drunk is a lot like kissing your attractive cousin, sure it seems fun at the time but in the morning you know you’re just going to regret it. Last week I was out for a friend’s bachelor party and as suspected, we made some very mature decisions on what our bodies consumed that night. I vaguely remember pulling out my phone as the night got hazier but it wasn’t until recently that I looked back at the garbage my thumbs were sharing with the world.

This one I really have no explanation for. I’m certain at the time I thought I had a giant revelation and this was the funniest thing I have ever thought of in my entire life. Looking back I now know this was no epiphany but you try telling drunken Dalton that at 2:00am in Atlantic City.



This next tweet I am almost certain was tweeted exactly at 3:16am. That is the only valid explanation to as why I would have written this.



This was the moment when I feared my every past movement that night. I have no clue what or why this would keep me up but clearly I was dealing with something giant and groundbreaking that night and sleep was not an option.



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