Should Easy-Bake Ovens Be Offered In Gender Neutral Colors?

I’m sure there are some annoying “progressive” parents who would say yes just because they love to argue with society but I still say absolutely not!

The easy-bake oven is the ultimate training tool for little girls so they can fall in line and grow up to be bare foot and pregnant in the kitchen. The last thing any dude wants is to marry some girl, throw her in the kitchen after their wedding day and find out she can’t cook. Once a guy discovers this there’s a solid chance he might leave her for her younger hotter sister who can at least heat up a hot pocket.  Easy-bake ovens help prevent future divorce.

Some family in NJ is all upset because their son wants an easy-bake oven for Christmas but they claim they don’t come in gender neutral colors. After 40 years of the introduction of the easy-bake oven it’s about time someone complained about the color.

First off the oven comes in purple which if I’m not mistaken is 100% gender neutral. Pink is for girls blue is for boys and when you mix them you get purple! Secondly, what kind of parent doesn’t first try to talk their son out of wanting an easy-bake oven? Remind him about how he is a boy and if he wants to cook something he can have a new four burner stainless steel gas grill. Then you can stuff his stocking with an assortment of rare meat that he can spend all of Christmas day butchering and grilling and tearing off the bone like a man!

Or better yet, if your son wants an easy bake oven set him straight by buying him a Dr. Dreadful Food Lab instead!