I’m pretty sure Jennifer Lopez had her thong on backwards during her “Live it up” performance on ITV’s Britain’s Got Talent.  Apparently I’m not the only one who is terrified by this 43 year old mucky muff trying to eat me through the television screen as there was a who lot of hoopla about her performance. Independent.co is reporting that viewers were shocked and disturbed by J-Lo’s outfit and performance and called it “inappropriate for a prime time family show”. I for one am shocked that the people of the UK would be so prude to the idea of a middle aged woman dressed like a McDonald’s Fry Kid with her leathery skin canyon hanging out.

In Jenifer Lopez’s defenses, you really can’t blame her for this performance. The song title it called “Live it up” and she is doing just that. Well, she’s living it up to the best of her abilities as a 43 year old pop singing. J-Lo has clearly reached the age where she can’t do the whole “pop her coochie” dance moves any more. Early stages of rigor mortis is setting in and her joints just don’t work that way anymore. So how can you perform with these limitations? It’s simple, you use the few tools that you got and highlight them to the fullest. Dress yourself up like a circus act and make sure everything brings the audience’s attention to one important focal point, regardless of how gross broken an tattered that point may be. Then choreograph a dance routine that requires little to no movement of any other body part but the old retired baby maker. Then hop on stage during British prime time television and attack the cameras with your hamburger meat monster as if it was trying to escape and gobble up the audience. The only thing that could have made this performance better would be a pair of 3D glasses.