Evolution Is Why We Still Have Ass Hair

When you look at your rump in the mirror, does it look like you sat on a small dog? Ever wonder why you have all that hair? Recently I was having a conversation with a friend who brought up the point that we really don’t have much of a need for most body hair especially in the rear apartment. Clearly I have odd conversations with my friends but she makes a good point. So to Google I headed for the answer to my question - why exactly do we have ass hair still?I found the answer pretty quickly in an article from Mother Board which explained that is in fact the fault of evolution that we still have it. Apparently it all comes down to how something impacts our ability to adjust to our environment so we can live long enough to reproduce. The article gives the example of people living closer to the equator have darker skin because someone who is very pale would die from the conditions in that environment pretty quickly thus the body will adjust over time to prolong life and thus the ability to reproduce. Ass hair apparently isn’t a barrier to surviving in various environments (uh body -  hello swamp ass) nor is it preventing people from having sex.

What baffles me though is how exactly are ugly people getting laid? I mean really - if evolution is truly at play then why aren’t we all the beautiful people? I’m being somewhat playful here because my mind went right to that but truthfully evolution explains how we are attracted to various appearances - thus why someone I may find attractive you may find to be hideous. Or vice versa.

So if you were wondering why we still have ass hair - it’s evolution’s fault. Damn Darwin.

Now you know.