Today Is Michelangelo’s Birthday

He painted a ceiling, sculpted naked statues, he can fight like a ninja and he is a party dude who loves pizza. Today is Michelangelo's birthday, so I think we should try to do all these things at once. Only then will you truly appreciate what it means to be a hero in a half-shell. 

You ever see that episode of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles where Michelangelo gets a job delivering pizza?

And he can't use the turtle van, so he sneaks one of those flying cars from dimension X out, and wears that trench coat and Uncle Fester mask?

If someone, or something delivered you a pizza in a flying car, and they are obviously a giant turtle wearing a mask, would eat the pizza?

Anyway, I can't remember what he needed the money for.

Michelangelo was a great man. I don't know who taught him how to paint and sculpt naked people, but they taught him well.

I would of like to be a sculptor, because in order to know how to sculpt a naked person you have to touch naked people. Then when you sculpt the naked person, it is like a interactive spank bank, then someone will buy it.

Why am I not a sculptor?

You can probably try to sculpt a naked person for Michelangelo's birthday, but make sure you get the person's permission. But do not date that person, anyone who wants you to sculpt them probably has a huge ego. If you're into that type a thing, then go ahead, everyone wants somebody to love.

Ok.... Do you think Michelangelo ever tried to sculpt April?