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The Worst Gay Bashing Cereal Burning Protester Is Dead

Well this just goes to show you, God loves Cheerios and if you try to gay bash outside General Mills headquarters, he will smite you dead!

So it looks like the cops can stop their investigation on the brilliant man who set fire to the lawn outside General Mills, mostly because according to the smoking gun he died! He dropped dead over the weekend running an errand near Andover Minnesota. Maybe instead for setting fire to those cheerios to show how NOT GAY he was, he should have eaten some – it could have lowered his cholesterol and he might be here still today. Instead, he’s dead and chances are he’s in a pit of endless burning cereal being forced to make out with big muscly men for all of eternity. Coincidentally, my image of his Hell sounds a lot like my heaven… I mean What? FOOTBALL, BEER, BOOKS ABOUT WAR, POWER TOOLS! Yeah that’s more like it!

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