Science Says Bras Are Bad for Women + Shirts Are Worse
Ladies, researchers have discovered that wearing a bra will make your tatas saggier — so lose those bras and while you’re at it, lose the shirts, their bad for a man’s health.
Men everywhere are in agreement with scientists, who are saying bras are bad for women, and we’re sure women are bursting with joy to rid themselves of such a useless piece of clothing.
These dudes “studied” over 330 French women, through what had to be an awesome 15-year period that proved wearing a bra won’t prevent second base from sliding past homebase, or keep a woman from becoming Quasimodo.
Why were we never invited to participate in this study? We took biology in high school. Well, sort of. We at least stayed awake during the anatomy chapters. Not to mention, we’ve done a ton of our own research. We know all shapes and sizes; perky ones, sad ones and we’ve never met a pair we didn’t like.
Taking measurements with extremely accurate measuring devices, we’re thinking their hands, but we could be wrong, they discovered that by not wearing a bra a chicks “melon muscles” strengthened and the TV tuners raised 7 mm. We just raised 7 mm, um, inches ourselves.
So, we’ve come to the conclusion for the good of science (and morale of men), that women need to take off the hooter hammocks (and shirts) for better health… And happier men.