Put down that cheeseburger!!!  A new poll puts New York State just outside the Top 10 Slimmest States in the country, but that’s not necessarily good news.

While 11th place sounds respectable, we’re still getting fatter by the nanosecond apparently.  According to a new poll, New York’s obesity rate has increased substantially in only two decades.  Back in the 90’s, people enjoyed tinier waistlines as the state earned a 9.3% overall obesity rating; today, that number has reached almost 30%.  Somehow, we still managed to come out better than most other states.  Here are some of those fun statistics.

Twenty years ago, Mississippi held the title for the worst obesity rate in the nation at 15%.  Going by today’s math, it would put Mississippi in the top spot as the fittest state in the U.S.  The method to figuring out an obesity rate hasn’t changed over the years it seems: to be considered obese, a person’s BMI (body mass index) must be greater than 30.

It’s hard to say whether this is actually comforting news or not since NY is pretty high on the non-fattie list.  That doesn’t make the statistics any less disturbing though.  To be fair, part of the blame lies with people and places that make awesome food, not just the people eating it.  Stop making that pizza with such deliciously thin crust and don’t pile on 12 lbs of that hot and spicy pepperoni and maybe we could all go down a pant-size or two.  It is, however, difficult at best to opt for that dry salad instead of a giant chicken parm torpedo, so I suspect it’ll be awhile before we see those numbers go down at all.  As long as NY is still at no. 11, I’ll triumphantly consume that last brownie without the slightest feeling of guilt.

I can’t help but think of something a very wise friend of mine once asked as we sat around a pile of chicken wings in front of the tube, “do you think we’ll see more commercials for relaxed-fit jeans as America gets fatter?”  I can’t say I’ve seen an increase in the amount of ads for those, but the emergence of pajama jeans alone I think is enough of a sign that the overweight-apocalypse is just around the corner.