Sometimes when you get older things don’t stay as hot and crispy as they use to. That’s where the toaster comes into play.

I just came across a pretty disturbing story about a dude in England who had to call the fire department to help him out of a pretty compromising position.

Firefighters came to the rescue of a man in distress when he got his penis stuck in a toaster.

It is unclear exactly what the humiliated gentleman had been up to, but fortunately London's finest arrived to extricate his manhood from the electrical device.”- mirror

Everybody knows you can’t use a fork to dislodge a toaster strudel, you’ll ruin the whole thing. Obviously the only reaching and poking tool that is sensitive enough to bring your breakfast out in one piece is in your pants.

I honestly can say this used to happen to me at least six times a year. My solution for this dude is to buy a toaster oven. It’s the only way to prevent the old clown from getting lodged up in that toaster again.