Back To The Future Has Failed 2015

First of all, this is a awesome picture. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside. It also makes me feel old, but that is not the point! 

The point is!

Where is my flying car?

And don't tell me that they have a hover board!

How am I supposed to get away from Griff and help Doc save Clara from the run away train with this?

All you can do with this is annoy people with that obnoxious sound. That is not the sound Marty's hover board makes!

Nike is coming out with power laces, BUT I DON'T WANT POWER LACES!

I want a jacket with a drying mode, I want a pizza hydrated to level four please, I want lawyers to be abolished and dust repellent paper. I want to know the exact second that it will stop raining!

I want a rejuvenation clinic and bionic implants!

Not plastic surgery!

I want platters of fruit that come down from the kitchen ceiling and cars that run on garbage.

I want more "Jaws" movies and they better not be Reboots!

It's all Crispin Glover's fault you see.

He wanted to make sure that part 2 & 3 of the "Back to the Future" movies would no longer be relevant because he is not in them. So he took the Almanac and stole the time machine and traveled back to 1985 and gave the book to himself. But Bill & Ted found out, because they are WILD STALLIONS! And Death got mad, because having a book like Gray's Sports Almanac is cheating! So they destroyed it and forced Crisipin Glover to be in "Charlies Angels" but forgot to make sure that Alex Winter would have a career. Without Alex Winter's Oscar caliber career there will be nothing to stop the Matrix from changing the future.

Fortunately, there was nothing the Matrix could do about Yoga Pants.