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How You Can Be the Next Research Assistant for Tucker Max

Photo by Andrew H. Walker, Getty Images

If you are not a fan of raunchy sex, drunk shenanigans, and other scandals, Tucker Max’s readings are not something you would be reading.  He’s a complete ass, but the guy rocks and has gained so much fame from his work. His first book was titled, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell. It was a great book and eventually turned into a movie. I read it while I studied abroad in Costa Rica. I warn you though, it’s something you should not read allowed in a public place (an airport, for instance). Uptight and conservative snots will intrude on your public readings of Tucker Max having explosive diarrhea or throwing up on a girl.

Within the past few years Tucker Max has come out with Assholes Finish First, and will be releasing Sloppy Seconds and Hilarity Ensues soon. Today, Tucker blogged about his new position he needs to fill for his next big project. As a Research Assistant, you will be doing a lot of transcribing. It entails a lot of work, and you are not guaranteed to have sex with him or even meet him for that matter, but the position is paid. If you’re interested in applying the instructions are very specific:

HOW TO APPLY FOR THE RESEARCH ASSISTANT GIG:

Because I am screening remotely and not meeting people in person for this job, this will be a three stage application process. The first step is very simple and easy, and will test whether or not you can follow instructions, which will be crucial in these tasks. If you want to apply for the job, do these things:

1. Before 5pm EST on January 24th, send an email to this email address: tuckermaxassistant@gmail.com

2. The subject line must read “Tucker Max Research Assistant Gig”

3. In the email, put four things: 1. your full name, 2. how old you are, 3. where you live, and 4. what the third largest magazine in the US is, by circulation

4. Attach a picture of Jason Williams to the email (not the basketball player). It must be either a gif or a jpg, and cannot be larger than 1 megabyte (1MB).

5. Do ONLY those tasks. Nothing else should be in the email.

If you follow all the tasks correctly, you will receive a response to your email, no later than January 24th, with a longer application and more instructions. If you get no response, it means you got something wrong.

Even if you’re not interested in applying read the blog anyways. It’s funny as hell. Yes, I am applying. Wish me luck!

 

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