It’s not every day I become jealous of women but if I could rock one of these C-String bikinis as a dude, I would be so happy. Look at the minimalist design. There is so much potential for mobility and freedom. No more restricting elastic waist bands to hold you back. No more unsightly tan lines. Just take this C-String bikini and cram it up your taint and you're ready to take on the world and the sun that shines on it. And the best part of this C-String bikini is not only does it look fashionable and awesome, but when you’re done lying out in the sun it can double as a great functional head band.

If I don’t see women of every size rocking these this summer I will flip. You girls don’t know how good you got it. You get the option to rock this space age eye patch for your vagina. Meanwhile here I am stuck wearing this lame side loading banana hammock like some sort of second rate citizen!