I couldn't make this up if I tried.  As bad as it sounds, it gets worse as you keep reading.  I won't spoil all the details, but some of the things you can look forward to in this blog include ass implants, transexuals, super-glue, tire sealant, and tubing.  Keep going - I dare you.

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It seems that plastic surgery is dangerous after all - someone better alert the Kardashians and Joan Rivers.  The story seems like something out of a Wayans' Brothers horror movie, but unfortunately for several people, it's a true story.

In Miami, a young woman looking for a curvier figure to help her land a "cocktail" job at a nightclub sought the medical assistance of a she-man to give her a discount on buttock implants.  Now, exactly how much information this person knew before going into the surgery is up for question, but the procedure only cost a mere $700 - red flag #1.  Usually, when some foreign concoction is being pumped into your body, it's going to cost a lot more than what I paid for my new couch (unless it's Botox - you can get that at any manequin-melting department store).

Moving on, the good "doctor" injected the victim with a combination of cement, super-glue, and flat-tire sealant.  As rock solid as that sounds, things didn't go too swimmingly and our naive young victim ended up in the hospital with some serious injuries.

Adding to this monstrous fail is the fact that said-"doctor" was operating without a medical license.  Did I mention he/she is also a transexual?  The twists just keep popping up around each corner!  Especially when it's been alleged that she-man performed the same operation on him/herself.

Moral of the story - Barbie was meant to be plastic, not people.

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