Forget what you knew about haunted houses, because this ride just raised the bar to a whole new level! This past weekend I was traveling from one wrestling show to another when some friends and I had a few hours to kill. We stumbled upon the Lewis county fair where we saw the spookiest of all spook rides we have ever spooky seen. My friend Dave paid for all of us to ride because he could see how shaken up we were.

If this video is a bit gaining let me paint these 27 seconds of horror for you.

You sit in a two person cart that looks like it was freshly painted in 1955 with led based paint shipped from china. An adorable meth head with 5 of his own teeth left sporting a stretched out tank top and due rag pulls a lever and you’re off. As you enter the “dark” haunted house you make a whiplash causing right turn only to be greeted by a left over costume of a mummy complimented by a green light and a buzzer. You then turn left and the horn from the movie “Herbie” sounds as table cloth shaped sort of like a human sits in a red light. Before you can say “yikes pencils” you whip right again into something that touches your arm. What is it, a snake, a giant ghost worm? No, it’s just an old extension cord (which I’m pretty sure isn’t part of the ride and the reason why nothing happened in this corner). Quick left and a quick right and you’re back in the safety of sun light and company of that lovely Meth head who originally sent you into certain doom.

I feel lucky to be alive after such a tragic experience.


This south park clip will give you a better idea of what I experienced.