A Canadian man was enjoying a camping and fishing trip with his good buddy up at a cabin in Ontario.  Early one morning, while unloading some personal logs in the outhouse, a black bear mauled him and dragged him pantless into the woods.

Gord Shurvell, age 65, was staying with 63-year-old friend Daniel Alexander in a cabin near Dunbar Lake. He admits his first mistake was leaving the door to the stench-filled outhouse door open so he could “enjoy the view.”

The bear attacked the Winnipeg, Manitoba native while his pants were down at his ankles. Shurvell tried using his hands and kicking with his feet to fend off the animal. That proved useless as the bear grabbed hold of the man and began to drag him out of the outhouse towards the brush. He then started to scream for help.

Alexander heard the scuffle and came out, then ran back into the cabin and returned with a shotgun.  By the time he reached the bear and his friend, they were in the brush huddled too close for him to get a shot off. Just then, the bear turned towards Alexander and was shot in the head.

Shurvell was treated for rabies, escaped with scratches up his arm and back.  (Seriously, he looks like he had a very rough night with a very rough dominatrix, without any of the enjoyment.)  He was also left with stitches under his arm and on a puncture on the back of his head.

Bet you won’t see that in a cuddly Charmin bear commercial, ey?