Playing the crash cymbals for the 'Star Spangled Banner' in your school band is kind of a big deal. It's definitely the most dramatic part of the song, and it only gets more dramatic when one of the cymbals breaks. What does one do when such a nightmare occurs? Take a cue from this kid who handled the situation like a bawse.
Hey, did you notice it's summer outside? It's time to start working on that "beat the heat" thing, and since the neighbors gave us weird looks when we just held a hose over our head during the hottest hour of the day, we're thinking lemonade might be the way to go. Sure a tall glass of classic lemonade sounds good, but why drink that all summer long, when you can add stuff to it like tequila? Or other fruit. But also tequila!
Look at that -- a cute video about a little girl who loves her daddy. JK! IT'S ACTUALLY ABOUT HOW "NON-WHITES" ARE TRYING TO DESTROY THE WORLD!! At least according to the racist internet monsters who said so many horrible things in the comments section of this video that Cheerios scrubbed and disabled them.
You probably think of Monopoly as that excruciating board game you have to play with your family, unless your mom likes to make her nephews cry and it gets banned from the house (thanks, Mom!). It turns out it's not the Parker Bros.' fault that the game is so mind-numbingly dull -- it's yours. You've been playing it wrong all these years.
Here's a nice, unsettling thing to look at: "Sloth-facing," also known as "Quasimoderping." Basically, you just move the eyes around a picture until it looks like a sloth and you are laughing/scared. It's pretty big on the internet right now, thanks to Redditor treverhaas, whose album of sloth-faced celebrities picked up some steam.
Of course, subreddit /r/quasimoderp have been doing this (more or less) for about seven months now, so there are lots of good celbrisloths floating around on the internet. Here are some of our favorites:
If you're not taking advantage of your baby's pliability and lack of motor control skills to pose them for silly photographs, frankly we don't understand why you even had kids. If for no other reason than to post a picture of your kid to Facebook every once in a while that is actually entertaining, instead of just sharing "the magic" of a 10-month-old eating pie. Of course they like it -- it's pie.
If you brought a spare pare of pants to work today, feel free to watch this video. Storm chasers Bradon Ivey and Sean Casey were sitting in their "Tornado Intercept Vehicle" when they quite literally intercepted a tornado.
Hooo boy, it is so close to being summer, we can practically hear the incessant song of the ice cream truck already. Frankly we don't want to wait until Monday to kick off the season. We can't. We've lost all control. Here are some pics of animals in kiddie pools to prove it.
Let this video be your inspiration/motivation for the day (or perhaps the rest of your life). Scott was born with cerebral palsy. Despite doctors telling his mother when he was a baby that he would be a "vegetable," Scott works out at the gym, and can lift bigger weights than we can. He also walks on a treadmill, which is more cardio than we've done in the past three years or so.
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